024 - Ramen Packets Are Not Condoms

March 18th, 2023  |  37 mins 16 secs

We're back after a three-year COVID nap, recording live at the Apex Combat Sports training facility.

023 - Freeway Frogger

February 13th, 2020  |  2 hrs 39 mins

Social media is cancer, the impeachment circus is over, Justin Novaria and Jim Ashley join us as guests, Florida Man strikes again, a flasher in Texas lost a game of Freeway Frogger, we get a first-hand account of the XFL experience, someone in Michigan thought it would be a good idea to invite Hitler to dinner, and we have another Virginia Tech Update. Join us for that and much more on episode 23 of Apex Live!

Apex Live Highlight - The TeddyBear Revelation

January 18th, 2020  |  7 mins 8 secs

Joining us for some random commentary on a variety of subjects, friend of the show and frequent contributor Justin "TeddyBear" Novaria reveals some interesting things about himself... and a few things that we never asked to know.

022 - It's Supposed to Condition the Anus

January 11th, 2020  |  2 hrs 1 min

The Best of Apex Live - Volume 1

December 9th, 2019  |  56 mins 7 secs

A compilation of some of the best moments from the first eight episodes of Apex Live.

021 - Pandora's AIDS Box

December 4th, 2019  |  1 hr 52 mins

We're back, and we have a lot to talk about.

020 - Cocaine C-Section

July 13th, 2019  |  1 hr 10 mins

Recording live on-location at the Gough Hazard in Parkersburg, West Virginia, the long hiatus is finally over. Steve and special guest Justin Novaria offer life updates, we reference MST3K, and so many more things that they won't fit here.

Apex Live 019 - Little Chode Dinosaur

February 9th, 2019  |  1 hr 42 mins

Steve decides that Hilary Swank is a female Willem Dafoe but without the acting chops. The start of the show catches Steve a little off-guard, and he wonders what animal has the deepest throat before ultimately deciding on his ex-wife. Steve also offers some wise words to the listeners. Can't argue with that. A spam email produces a coupon that seems mildly inappropriate, and we decide that "rubbers" or "jimmies" is funnier than "condoms". Our friend, sponsor, and frequent contributor Jim Ashley chimes in with a guest commentary submission. The reality of the 50 Shades series is discussed (SPOILER ALERT: It's not BDSM, it's assault and battery). Meanwhile, Brad absolutely refuses to watch Brokeback Mountain, despite Steve's insistence that it's a comedy and not a drama, and Steve discovers a new way to describe Godzilla's (or Godzirra's) son. We learn that a naked owl looks like it's been on meth but wonder if owls are immortal. AOC is saying stupid things again and we're all over it, just like Steve would be all over her if the scenario and proper motivation were presented. Steve enlightens us on the be-all-end-all universal fix for broken phones, we wonder if Ross Perot is dead (he's not) or if it's the Mandela Effect, and we have an honest discussion about cops. This episode's Virginia Tech Update involves the sadness of the necessity of buying an extra game against Marshall just to gain bowl eligibility. Brad offers a small writing update and discusses the merits of the TV show "Renegade". We wrap up with a discussion of the beach and hope for the new year. All this and more in episode 19!

Apex Live Highlight - Steve's Blackout Checklist (Episode 018)

February 1st, 2019  |  51 secs

From episode 018, Steve lists the items on his Blackout Checklist, for when he needs to make sure everything is okay following an eventful night out.

Apex Live 018 - Smashin' with a Passion

December 29th, 2018  |  2 hrs 6 mins

The hot mic pre-show discusses an adventure at Dunham's Sporting Goods, cigarette prison currency, and the alternative uses for the ol' keister. Steve believes that you don't have to keister in a white-collar prison. Brad's girlfriend, Ashley, is in studio for episode 18 and that alone makes this one special and energetic. Steve and Brad offer life and work updates, one of which is so bad that it cannot be fully discussed on the show... and that's saying something... and we collectively wonder how to define the Christmas-itis. Brad ended up back in the hospital one last time in 2018, involving high temperatures, misdiagnoses, and collapsing in the living room at the house, and Steve compares it all to an episode of Little House on the Prairie. Then we find out not only that Steve played soccer, but what we different when he did... or so he says. Pretty women hold tremendous power, and Ashley has managed to get Brad to watch all eight Harry Potter films. We reminisce about the first time we saw the first Britney Spears music video. A vicious Aaron Hernandez joke, and a discussion about some shocking news regarding the rumors surrounding his sexuality, leads to Steve dropping a dynamite Christopher Lowell reference that could be the most obscure, shocking reference made in eighteen episodes of the podcast. Ashley and Steve talk about their common ground as guitar players thanks to a Sweetwater catalog (sponsor us!), and we all deny the reports and pitfalls of a wood shortage in the world. Before the break, sponsor, owner of Blue Gold Title Research, and friend of the show Jim Ashley chimes in with a listener commentary to follow up on his recent appearance on episode 017.

After the break, Brad and Steve talk about the recent championship fight between Adonis Stevenson and Oleksandr Gvozdyk, which ended in an eleventh-round knockout and left the now-former champion, Stevenson, in a coma, and highlight how we may not feel as bad as we normally would because of his history as a Haitian pimp that abused and turned underage girls out as prostitutes. Several attempts are made to discuss the recent passing of our 41st president, George H.W. Bush, on November 30th, but things get sidetracked. The sidetracking issues include: Brad's hatred of Kirby Puckett and Kent Hrbek, Brad and Ashley's hatred of Bryce Harper, Steve's trash-talking son, sickle cell anemia, the nonsensical beliefs of Jehovah's Witnesses and Scientologists, acquiring someone else's traits through blood transfusions, Steve's uncle's love of Van Halen and cocaine, and Crystal Pepsi. We learn that a certain child actor should not have been Home Alone with Michael Jackson, throw some unexpected respect at Ross Perot, and talk about how we miss Dave Markert. Steve thinks that former president Obama is a dickhole, his politics notwithstanding. Brad, Steve, and Ashley present their Top 5 Goals for 2019, we learn that head will make you do a lot of things, and we hear about appearances from the shocker, the minivan, and Horns Down. Getting drunk and then smashed, or just smashed, is alluded to... just before one of the most horrific and distasteful references in the history of broadcast media is made and Brad has to ask the Lord for forgiveness for even hearing it. Steve fills us in on his Blackout Checklist, hates Oprah Winfrey, briefly confuses Roots and The Color Purple, and talks about his personal experience with Roots outtakes. We listen to the viral video of Grover possibly being profane in a recent episode of Sesame Street before offering up our final Virginia Tech Update of the year as we close what might be our craziest show of the year... or ever.

BrightSideSteve #FriendBoySteve #NoHurtButthole #FBama #YourNameIsToby #HokieTrash #WeMissYouDave #JuanitaMargarita #ESK

Apex Live Highlight - Jim Ashley Interview (Episode 017)

November 28th, 2018  |  34 mins 17 secs

Our interview with Jim Ashley, owner-operator of Blue Gold Title Research, friend, longtime listener, and inaugural sponsor of the show. Jim discusses the nature of his business, the upcoming West Virginia football game against Oklahoma on Black Friday, and his recent international travels before offering his feedback on Apex Live presenting his own Top 5 Desert Island Women list.

Apex Live 017 - Is Feline AIDS a Thing?

November 21st, 2018  |  1 hr 50 mins

In the cold open, Steve opens the show by wondering some things about Magic Johnson's son, the truth of how Magic actually contracted the AIDS, and then something about goat AIDS. Finally, the show begins to the news that the Stolen Summer is over, and the phoenix has risen. Brad and Steve offer a brief life update, we are introduced to the possible future appearance of Ambien Steve, and Steve unveils the previously unknown fact that he has been a sleepwalker for much of his life. Experimental aircraft are deemed unacceptable, Steve finds out that Roy Halladay is dead, and the possibility arrives that Steve and Stephanie might already be common law married. Be thankful that you can wake up every morning and not be Richard Ojeda, embrace libertarianism if you are sick of an oversized, overreaching government, and extend a big middle finger to the FCC, IRS, and FDA. Brad talks about his recent surgeries and his new job as a court reporter. To close the first segment, Brad and Steve celebrate Thanksgiving by discussing things for which they are thankful (although CBS is not on Brad's list because of their decision to cancel "Salvation").

In the second segment of the program, we welcome Jim Ashley, owner-operator of Blue Gold Title Research, friend, longtime listener, and inaugural sponsor of the show. Jim discusses the nature of his business, the upcoming West Virginia football game against Oklahoma on Black Friday, and his recent international travels before offering his feedback on Apex Live presenting his own Top 5 Desert Island Women list.

All this and more is prominently featured in episode 17 of the podcast. Let us all give thanks for friends, family, faith, and Apex Live. #GoldustJohnson #FelineAIDS #WatchYourSix #ESK

Apex Live Highlight - Special Podcast Announcement

October 22nd, 2018  |  34 secs

It's a very special announcement for Apex Live. Big news for the future of the show!

Apex Live 016 - Birdshot is the Best

October 7th, 2018  |  2 hrs 25 secs

In the cold open, we find out from Steve that Stephanie lost a bet with some serious consequences. Steve recaps his California adventure, which did not include visits to Slab City or Skid Row. The rural life is better than metros; violence, the insanity, you all can have it. We'll take the slow-paced suburban or rural life over tourist cities and metros any day. There is a correlation between the city making all of the mainstream entertainment being the same city that makes all the porn. The ignorance and stupidity of going to the beach and eating at Long John Silver's. However, Captain D's lobster rolls are unapologetically amazing. Justin Novaria chimes in with his "Talkin' with the TeddyBear" listener commentary on how modern feminism is destroying our world. In the second half, Steve offered friendly, solicited advice. We have another VIRGINIA TECH UPDATE! The Hokies never disappoint... except when they disappoint themselves and their fans. HBO is out of the boxing business and while that means no more Max Kellerman, it's also the end of a 45-year era. Finally, we revisit the brilliance of Ben Shapiro's reminder that facts don't care about your feelings and make a big show announcement. #WatchYourSix #SocialismKills #HaglerBeatLeonard #MaxKellermanIsAButthole

Apex Live 015 - A Prevalence of Assholes

September 20th, 2018  |  1 hr 55 mins

Steve acts as the temporary West Coast Correspondent while he is in California for work and laments his lack of interaction while in the porn capital of the United States. West Coast Walmarts, technical support, the Labrea Tar Pits, the HOV lane, and Airborne AIDS are all discussed as part of Steve's review. A major show announcement is made before the rematch between Gennady Golovkin and Canelo Alvarez is discussed. SPOILER: We hate Max Kellerman. Following the GGG-Canelo II talk, Brad and Steve consider the possibility of Pacquiao-Mayweather II and why we desperately do not need that fight to happen again. Before the break, it's time for another Virginia Tech Update. In this episode, the subject is, again, criminal activity and the Hokies are #2 in the country. Way to go, VPI! After the break, Steve reveals the best place to be homeless before Brad unpacks his hatred of the self-checkout lanes and all of the reasons why, which somehow leads to talk about robot pharmacists, gas prices, why Americans rarely back up their big talk about prices they refuse to pay, Viking funerals, and ICQ. In the teaser of our new correspondents, Steve advocates the creation of the Apex Live Juggies and the purchase of a trampoline. In closing, we remind everyone that socialism kills. #BuckUpAndSayYes #WatchYourSix

Apex Live Highlight - Brad Answers Steve's Third Question (Episode 014)

July 31st, 2018  |  15 mins 44 secs

From episode 014, Steve gets to ask Brad anything on his birthday and the third question brings about a lengthy and emotional response.